Light in the Darkness

It has been one week since we were “matched” with our birth mother and the reality of everything is starting to sink in.  We have busily spent the last six days frantically making plans, backup plans and backup-to-the-backup plans.   Plane tickets have been purchased, hotels booked, and bags are packed. Now we wait.  And as we wait my brain has been running nonstop. We have experienced a myriad of emotions; shock, excitement, fear, joy.  I am mentally preparing myself for what may very well be the hardest experience of our lives to date.  The fear of the unknown is very hard for me. I like to have control in situations. I like to plan for the future.  We have absolutely no way to prepare or to know how the birth of our daughter will go. We know she will be born addicted. We have done the research; I have watched the horrific videos. It will not make us change our minds. It will not make us love her less. In fact it will make us love her more.  We are as prepared as we can possibly be. It is going to be traumatic and we are terrified. We have made the choice to face the darkness with light in our hearts. I appreciate people’s concern. We are concerned too. However worrying is not the answer, no good can come of it.  Things can wrong in an ideal pregnancy. If anyone knows that, it is us. Overall, the outpouring of love and support has been amazing.  We are so blessed to feel so much love from our families and friends. If there is one thing I am certain of, it is that this is not going to be easy and that we will need help. I feel so fortunate to be surrounded by amazing people that I know will be by our sides during this amazing experience.  Thank you. No words can describe the appreciation I have for you all.

 

Now, God be praised, that to believing souls gives light in darkness, comfort in despair.
William Shakespeare